ROXY

Allah has already written the names of your spouses for you. What you need to work on is your relationship with Allah. He will send her/him to you when you’re ready. It is only a matter of time...

my life baby! _____________________________________________________

err.i cant edit the rest of the pictures because smhw it became corrupted. gahhhhh.wasted. but i found a picture of me that i like!heee. today's friday! gah, how time flies. oh anw, ystrday me and hamizah caught an impromptu movie. "I dont know how she did it" i think that's the title. the movie is so SWEEEEEEEEEEEEET!, TOUCHING, and funny! catch it pls! gah, ive been dying to watch johnny rebond. hamizah refuse to watch with me. :( nvm, shall catch it with another person then. okay take care. have a nice weekend! :) xoxo

LOVE.YOU.SO.MUCH. YOU'RE THAT LITTLE JEWEL I KEEP IN MY HEART.

I wanna take more photos of my friends! from dslr! haha. sigh. its so hard to edit pictures from iphone, phone, or whatever that is of low quality. very the cacat after editing. haha.OH MY. im kinda excited to try out some gory effects on my friend's pictures.haha YAH. PROBABLY I WILL STEAL THEIR PICS smwhere. hahaa. its for practice purposes. nthg else. :)) and ill make a poster of the 3 of us with this hantu face. and print it for u all. haha.OMG. this shall be my project. since i have nthg better to do while waiting for the call to start work. haha.bye

before after

bored. tryna out some picture editing.

heyyy young homie whatcha you trippin' on!

my pillar of strenghts. the reason i smiled, laugh and cry. sweet, bitter times. 24/09/2011 :))

SORRY HAMIZAH!! I know this is kinda a dissapointing bday for you this year. but trust me, me and deavi really put in our hardcore effort to make it a memorable day for you. but sadly enough, things cock up. plans foiled. and yeah, so, can't really blame anyone here. but i hope you enjoyed the rest of the remaining day with us. cose we did enjoy every moment with you! :) sooooooooo, change of plans. all of us headed down to serangoon to watch a late movie. FRIGHT NIGHT! OMG. DISGUSTING MUCH! so sickening lah, seeing bloods splashing evrywhere. and corpses lying here and there. fresh blood. EEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. now i think i cant really stand looking at beeef. i am going veggyyyyyy!haha vegetarian lah konon. padehal baru makan daging tadi.haha. ok whateever. it's just gross. but okaylah,watching movie will be better if im not that sleepy.haha and after movie, we went back to deavi's hse. haha. we are so sorry for making u think that we're bringing u to a h...

NURHAMIZAH OMAR! MY BESTFRIEND SINCE SEC2! OH MY!. its been 20-14= 6 6 years!! since i know you. awww. i gotta admit that it was kinda hard to keep this friendship gg strong because both of us are hot headed and have big ego's!haha. YEAH, but well, look where we are now. closer than ever. dah mcm blood sista lah! heee. okayy ape nak cakap eh. dosent matter lah wat age ure at now. i just hope that years to come, ill still be your bestfriend. and we have yet to travel together! lets do it one day okayyyyyy! OMG I WANT TO DO THIS SEY. maybe when we're like 22?haha. i want to do so many things with youuuuuuuuuuuuuu and deavi! i hope you 2 pls dont have a boyfriend nw that we're still young and enjoying our teenage days. COME ON. FREEDOM OI. okay out of topic. haha. but seriously, im happy for whatever success you've achieved. IM HAPPY FOR YOU. AKU DOA KO AKAN SELAMAT DUNIA, AKHIRAT. insyaallah! u have a friend in us! HAPPY 20TH BDAY SAYANGKU NURHAMIZAH. haha. (melampau) heh...

YE HOOOOOOOOOOOOO. my stomach is feeling soooooooo much better. :) alhamdulillah!. thank god. ntg serious. the medication really helps. turn out i got this condition of severe smthg. related to stomach contraction, the mucles surrounding... OK. Its too long. fgot whatever the doc said. okay soooooo. I FEEEEEL GOOOOOOOOOD. :)) kk. final intvw was okay.haha. i thought it was gg to be long and draggy. turn out it was so short, i dont even feel it was an intvw. more like a short chat with the HOD. yeah she's boring. so thank god it was short. haha. anw i gotta work with one guy. awkwardddddddddddddd. never work with someone my age bfore. i mean tk kenal.hehe. Anw itsokay lah. he looked like mat arabic. and kinda cuteeeeeeee.hehe. okay tk boleh flirt! tk professional langsong. sheesh. once i work in sch. it means i must maintain myself. OMG. SET GOOD EXAMPLE FOR THE STUDENTS. ME? OMG. i must remind myself. NOT TO SHOUT/SCREAM OR BE CHILDSIH. NOT BE FLIRTISH TO THE STUDENTS (OMG!) BE SER...

so sick. barely have much energy. woke up full of blood all over. god, i cant even describe the pain. the excruciating pain at my abdominal area is just limiting myself to walk. eating wasnt that helpful. i just feel like vomiting nw and then. so terrible. took myself to the doctor. serious contraction at my abdomen. went to CGH as advised to get myself checked and yeah the medicine. :( gosh. the pain gets terrible and terrible every month. i hope the pain will reside soon. so much pain.i wished the doc can just jab me to sleep. argh.

dear mak and abah, I'm gg to step into adulthood world soon. for the past 19 years and ongoing, i realised, i was nt being a good filial daughter. until now, i am clinging on for your support financially even when im already at this age. i feel useless nt be able to help both of you lighten your burdens. at times, i make you worry with my bad habit of coming home late. i was rude. i shout, i raised my voice. i was that bad. im really sorry. :( i will try to be a good daughter to both of you. both of you have done enough for the family. im sorry to become a burden to you. i am. i always pray that both of you will be at god's heaven. be where you deserve to be. :) i love you. ________________________________________________________________________ dear amin, i missed you so much. when ure at home, i feel annoyed that u dont seem to be any help to the family/housechores. bt i appreciate you for your presence at home. acc mak at home since both me and aidil are constantly outside. ...

tired, hungry, lost, bruised. sad. i walked nwhere with my baju kurung. along the dark dark road. people staring at me, wondering why im walking at such desolated places alone. with my eyes all red frm all the crying. i just walked on. i just dont care where i was going. i was distraught. those words. just keep repeating on my mind. i realised that i was wrong. it was wrg for me to take out "" right after the lesson. bt i was just being me. i dont like being forced. im a bad person. i know. bt saying all those words wont make me chge into a better person. walked and walked and walked. until my leg got bruised. got lost. thnk god, i found my way. walked my way home. im tired. hope ill sleep and forget my sadness. gdnight.

OMG. I THINK I HAVE AN ALLERGY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! or is it the mosquito! i have itches all over my body. and red spots everywhere. my god. dah mcm chicken pox sia. i hope the itch will reside soon. makes my leg looked ugley. eii. ---------------------------------------------------------------

green line, red line, grey line, purple line. GAH.so tiring! went to like only 3 houses and the places are all over the places! MY GOD. really, its tiring to travel by public transport. im actually too lazy to go raya. bt ni hmizah eh suka nah nk merayap sini sana. mcm lipas terbang!haha. fst up. went to pasir ris. to hilmi's place. which is not my friend. nor my enemy. just a passerby in my life. HAHA.k merepek. anw, we took taxi. waste duit bas aku betol. yah, ok, that guy looked okay. no comments.haha! bt his brother eh.... adoiii hansem banget. tkley angst!haha. we ate lontong. so, overall first hse ws okayyyyyyy. the house should be a bit neater la. :)haha. bnyk comment eh.hehe. kk.met ali after that. walking hari raya hse. haha. good la.dont even need to travel to tamp. and we even get raya money!haha alhamdulillah. so far, he gave us the most compared to the other houses we go.haha. baik jugak mamat ni eh.hha. kk then to bukit panjang. THIS PART cnnt angkat ah the jouney. nk...

MAYBE. i should dream whatver i wanna dream, go where i wanna go, be what i wanna be. do what i wanna do. because i have one life, and one chance to make my dreams happen. live every moment of your life! :))) -------------------------------------------------------------- my dreams are: 1) GO OVERSEAS!!! i wanna realx, chill, swim with the fishes, lay at the grass and gaze at the stars. i wanna climb a mountain, go hiking................ and the list goes on!. haish, i hope i can really do all this soon. if only money isnt a problem. haizzzzzzzzzzzzzz. i wanna do all this with my bffs! collect money and we'll have a virgin trip on our own! after all, we have experience what!haha. like the east coast camp held by me!haha. that was a real tough life out there. haha. okkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk. ONE DAY. K? HEE!

ITS FRIDAY, FRIDAY, FRIDAY. WOOOOOOOOOO YEAHHHHHHHHH. haha. okay, i dont understand, why i am the one kecoh2 here. padehal bukannya aku keje monday to friday. haha.GAHHHH. OKAY. today i visited my nenek! yeee haaaaaaaaaaaa.*kuda mode* haha. okay, i missed AFIQ, when i arrived jst nw, i was greeted with a horrifying sight!!! BABY POOP. haha.omg nw i realise, baby poop isnt like ours. their's are GREEN! euwwwwwwwwwwww!!!! AND LONG. EUWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW. haha. omg, my nenek is really a super woman. I WONDER HW she jaga baby, cook, do hsework, all within a day. if i eh, pengsan halfway liao. ehehe. AFIQ IS GETTING BIGGER. and VERY ACTIVE. tkley duduk diam! haha. bt SO CUTEEEEEEEE.haiz. i wish i was humorous to babies. HAHA.ok jk. he actually loves me.hehe. hee. biasalh :)) KAY LAH. ALL GE TIDO PLS. I WANNA TDOOOOOOOOOO. WEEEEEEEE. GDNIGHT!

yesterday : first day of interview. it was fine. I think i sound confident. STEP LAHH!haha. ive learnt my mistake. i went all out for it, i hope i wasnt bragging!hahaha ok i passed, and ive to go through anther intrview, which is today! THEY GAVE ME A TASK. i have to do my own presentation. omg, hw nervous! its been months since ive presented in front. ALONE LAGI! haiz, bt well again, i just membebel through my slides. and thank god!. I MADE IT. alhamdulillah. last interview, will be the most important INTVW. im MORE NERVOUS then evuh. nx wed. omg! i think i have to dress to kill. i dont wanna my effort to put to waste. anw I DONT REALLY KNOW IF I CAN MAKE IT.U KNW TEACHING. hahaa.i just cant imagine.hehe. OMG,HOD OF IT.MAMPOSSSSSSSSSSS. the person send me a list of things to prepare myself. SEEING THE LIST, MAKES MY LEGS ALL WOBBLY. I SHALL CUT AND PASTE HERE SOON. just for u to understand hw horrible are my days, counting frm today till nx wed. GAHHHHHHH. SERAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM...

do not be shocked! haha. take a deep breath and yeah, just refrain urself frm getting a heart attack. cose ure abt to see. a very VERY BAD CROPPING OF A WOMAN. U HAVE BEEN WARNED.... ARE U READY?? DO NOT EVER TRY THIS ON SOMEONE'S PICTURE. PLEASE. I BEG U HERE U GO... ................ HAHAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA OMG. AIDIL DID THIS. OMG.WHAT IZ THIS! *FAINTS!* MCM HANTU BOLONG SIA.AHAHAHAA

OK HI!!!!!!!! haha. OMYGOD. I FEEL GUILTY. BIG TIME. I BUIH THE SEARCH AGENCY. I FEEL BAD FOR KETA. the person who helped me find the job. :( im sorry! hehe.actually i was given a job already. dah boleh start lagi. but, i turned them down last minute. after gg thru interview and such. I TURNED THEM DOWN. OMG, what was i thinking. i was actually looking for a bigger fish in the sea. haha. mampos. WISH ME LUCK PEOPLE. :) heee. OKAY WAT ELSE. I SAKIT PEROTTTTTTTT. I no likey likey. HOPE, im nt gnna have last min sakit perot tmrw. so impt for me. i hope i can pull through. insyaallah! okay, ill update again soon. maciam malas ah!. haha. k bye la.

Tulang rusuk Adam yang hilang, biarlah dia yang mencarinya sendiri. Hawa pula, tunggulah dan bersabarlah, tak perlulah kamu yang mencari Adam. Kerana kamu tetap tulang rusuknya yang hilang, dia akan datang mencarimu dan mengambilmu satu hari nanti. Apa yang boleh kamu usahakan Hawa ialah berdoa agar Adam yang datang itu adalah Adam yang beragama, beramal dengan agamanya dan punya akhlak yang baik. Dengan kata lain dapat membimbing kamu ke jalan yang lurus untuk ke syurga. Insya'Allah,Amin♥

Wow. Im blogging frm my experia lah sey!!! Hehe bt sumpah annoying, dah la screen kecik, keypad pon mcm annoying. its just nt comfortable. Okok.sape yg nak tahu kan.hehe. anw, today is nt a gd day. is it my stomach?, my heart? Or my veins/ nerves. gosh, cnt stand the pain eevrywhere. Hope its ntg serious. I need to get my nerves fixed fst. this calls for massage!. kk hp nk mati. chiooowssss

and tday is MONDAYYYYYYYYYYYY. weihoooooo! ahha.its been 1 month ++ since im unemployed. and im feeling the groove. GERRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE! haha. ok dah. anw, sat was fun with the kids! haha.aww rindu dorg. sunday, went to open house t yishun. yeah, initially i dont wanna go. bt looking at the $$ i got. i dont think i regret coming. AHAH but, heartache bodoh. having to spend more than half on the taxi fare. so at last, it was like i just gotten $4. haha.nvm at least kenyang lah eh. then went to taz house OMG, I LOVE HER COOKING. ALWAYS GO FOR HER TAHU GORENG. YUM YUM.haha. anw, NO, went there not for the food. but for religious studies. hehe. went home, an ustaz send us home. initially i was AWED by his large car. i toally made a fool out of myself.haha. i commented about the tinted window. like this. "WAHH, WINDOW TINTED LAGI" u know i was awed by the tinted window, and the big car. only to realise that it was a taxi!. MALU PAH! haha. thank god i didnt make comment out l...

i ate dinner worth of $19.50 yesterday. yeah, i was itching to spend the notes of money inside my wallet. u knw, im been cracking my head to how am i supposed to make my thick wallet thinner. the bulky notes of money eh. haiz. too much ah. HAHA! MY GOD. WHAT RUBBISH. *MOANS AND CRIES* i almost drop dead looking at the bill. haha. me and hamizah ate at pizza hut.ordered spaghetti and ice-lemn tea. plus the unreasonable service charge and gst. OMG!! nk pengsan i! haha. oh nvm, i think im gnna eat plain rice for the nextt few days. hehe. okay today is saturday and the weather is AWESOMEEEEEE!! kk.enjoy everyone.

HARLOOOOOOOOOOO its fridayyy *scratch stomach* haha.inside joke. stupid though. anw i just got back from SHAW LIDO BAYBEH omg! THE THEATRE IS PATHETICLY SMALL. ITS ALMOST TINY. haha. kesian. and we were like seating like 2 rows away from the screen. haha.imagine how close is that. spoil my eyes only. hehe. so close i think i can touch the screen.haha.k ni merepek. anw me and hamizah watch final destination 5!!!!!!! haha. i didnt know there was 1-4. and its alrdy 5. mcm WOW! anw cerita was OKAYLAH. GE-ROSSSSSSSS. but normal ah. the storyline is the same, I CAN PREDICT THE ENDING TOO. BORING. which means the movie's nt worth it la. if i can predict the ending means, I UNDERSTAND the movie TOO WELL which is weird since i always have a hard time UNDERSTANDING storylines of movies. heheh. anw dont eat while watching that movie. eii yer. nk muntah aku!. and if ure suffering from osteoporosis, do not watch too! BECAUSE there's one part whereby one girl fall and break all her bones. CA...

i must start wearing specs laaaaaaaaaaa my eyesight is becoming worstttt. adoii. the weird thing is, my left eye stays the same. degree never shoot up whatsoever. vision clear. haha. only my right eye eh, dont knw why shoot like 350 degrees! WADOI. like weird eh, have 1 eye blur and other eye clear. haha. anw THANK GOD my left eye can be depended on.haha. kalau tk,habis meraba lah aku. my specs degree is so precise, it makes me MABOK when i walk. i wanna do specs with lower degree. fast facts: Pri 1 or 2, i start wearing specs alrdy. then pri 3 or 4, i think, my specs broke, and from tt day onwards, i stopped waering specs. BAD DECISION!. see lah nw potek liao. haizzzz.hehe. K I NEED SPECS. GRRR

Sometimes i feel that im stuck between my dream and reality. these few days eh, my dream felt so real, so real that i felt that IT WAS REAL. like its really happening. its like i was thinking abt someone or smthg, then i fell asleep.and then my dream would involve whatever i was thinking. okay i dont think u people understand what i was babbling about. haha. okay example. before i sleep, i was thinking about mee goreng. then in my dream, i dreamt, i went to the shop and buy mee goreng. then i wake up i would like think i ate mee goreng alrdy. SO REAL IT SCARED ME! ERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGHHHHHHHHHHH okay dah enough. Anw i got interview later. BORING LAH. haha.perangai. k bye!

Afiq must be the most luckiest baby in the world. OR perhaps the most unfortunate baby.hahah. u decide. BECAUSE. he's the first baby ive carried in my 2o years of living. ok 19++++ years. OMG, isnt he lucky!haha. i was forced to carry him because there were no other option at that point of time. SCARY OR WHATTTTT. if he's light nvm la.haha. look at his drumstick legs!. hahaha. god forgives me for saying such things. haha. okay, its either he's lucky or unfortunate BECAUSE. the way ive carried him must be so wrg!haha. MENGGELIAT SIA tu anak. hahaha.i also almost drop him!. nt drop la. i mean mcm terbalikkan tu budak. haha. and one thg for sure. i FAIL AT ENTERTAINING BABIES. hahha. he kept a sraight face and looked as if i was lame. when i make a face or whatsoever i was trying to do. hahah. OMG AKU FAILLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!! hahhaa its oky. every failure is a step to success. even though success for me seems a bit slow for me. haha. kay whatevuhhhhhhhhhhh. bye lah. haha.

why so hard?! ive tried my best. now bertawakkal saje lah. i believe god will find a way out for me. pls god. PLEASE. this calls for night prayers. insyaallah. Kun Fa Ya Kun.

ok more like i looked like i wanna cry!haha

I LOVE BOTH OF YOU TO THE MAX. i dont know what kind of ridiculous sibling i am, not talking to both of you. i have no idea why too. i feel like slapping myself because of this. actually, i REALLY love you two. esp my small brother. we did almost everythg together when we were small. we fought, we quarell, but we were like bestfriends.. i would stand up for you when ur friends bully you. make u cry, i would be there for you whenever u did somehtg silly at sch or what. we would play ball downstairs, do thgs tgether. bt now, friends seemed to be ur pirority. i can understand why. parental pressures. and no one u can talk to at home. obviously friends are the only choice left. GAH I FEEL SO USELESS. i dont want u outside doing nonsense. if only u choose ur friends wisely. u smoke packs and packs of cigg. gets me worried too. i dont want anythg happening to you. dont do anytg stupid. please. :( from ur useless sister. ily

pressure. coming frm all sorts of people. gah. cant take this. cycling tmrw i guess. :/

?Why must I keep feeling that people will leave me? why so sensitive about small issues? why do I keep telling myself to be prepared in case what I dread happening will haeppen? The past. that's what haunting me. People and their promises. mountains of them. and when I start trusting them, they go back to their words. They come and go. as and when they like. Where goes the pact, the promises? hell lot of them. And that is why, the feeling of insecurity in me Sorry. If im too emotionally attached to someone.. and that someone had another someone else. id rather be invisible. because sooner or later,id be dumped aside. Left like that way too many times. it turned into a fear. I wanna run away.. :(

Sometimes I wish I can sleep all day and night. Because when I sleep, I dont feel troubled. waking up just means, being reminded of the troubles bugging in my mind. sighs. I wonder when I can stop worrying. feel like talking to someone. but wells. Confirm they also busy. haish

trust me. i cant be bothered. ;) im immune to all this things already. do i even have a choice? hmm. ___________________________________________________________

AND our family goes BLUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE on the first day. goshh. everywhere we go, people are wearing blue. boring!haha. mybe nx year, im planning to wear stripes. baju kurung stripes in different color. ah kau! dasyat tu!hehe. and this is the only pic taken. HAHA.sorreeeeeeeeeh. we all camera shy!hehe. first day of raya. was okay. a bit of drama. wooooooooooo.haha. but ohwells, lets just ignore it. afiq dah pakai baju kurung sheyy. OMG, he so small, he wear baju kurung, songkok and samping!!!!!!! haha. HOW CUTE! alah, if only got pictures. kental laaa. camera smua mcm taikkk. okoklah. im like very lazy to type this few days. even though i got loads to talk abt. maybee lahter, or anther day perhaps. okay peeps. have a nice dayyyyyyy!. selamat hari rayaaaaaaa.